Amsterdam

Musik: Better - Regina Spektor
Kleiden: Pink camisole, blue jeans
Filme: My Sister's Keeper (Cassavetes)
Buchen: In the Beauty of Lilies by John Updike

A couple of weeks ago I went on holiday to Amsterdam. I've now decided that I simply must move there and live there forever. It's an amazing city; I actually love it.

I was reluctant to put this poem on my blog as it's a tad - shall we say controversial? Then I figured: fuck it. I like it. It's about the Red Light District or, more specifically, a prostitute there. It doesn't have a name...the Dutch for prostitute is rubbish. Sounds too cute!

Blood, oh blood
Falling from nowhere
Falling from pubic hair
Look, now it’s everywhere
Dripping down my wrists
Bleeding in, bleeding out
Naked, I am so very naked
I am not there
So I do not care
If you wish to stare
Soft, soft
My breasts are rounded, small
And I am not so very tall
Slender, pale
A feminine form
Stained by scarlet
Tainted, used
My scars are…
Shining and irreversible
I am marked
I am special
I am mad
Mad
MAD
At you, of course
But really?
At myself
I stab, stab, stab
And hammer it in
A thick rusty nail
I shall do it with a grin
As the hot springs rush up
From my palms
And I do mean some harm
Truly, I do

Jesus never endured so much pain
He never suffered as I did
Because he died, he died, he died
And I did not
Mein Gott!

Mary was an old maid
She never did get laid
Then what was the point
In going through that pain?
When she never even got the good part

Touch me
And I will feel loved
If I am intoxicated enough
Sweet saint! Sweet saintly love
It is my cross to bear
And I swear
I cannot bear it
And I’m so full of shit
I’m about to graphically explode

Bleed me dry
Since God can’t fuck me
I’m safe
From bearing his Virgin child
So baby, let’s go wild!